Thursday, January 26, 2012

The last day

Today is the day I've been hoping wouldn't come. Today is the last day my sweet baby girl will not have something covering her eyes at all waking times. Her glasses will be placed on her sweet face for the first time tomorrow. The appointment is first thing in the morning which is nice. I really just want to get it done and over with. For some reason in my head I keep picturing her with glasses and can't. It seems so unnatural that a three month old would need them. It seems so unreal that MY three month old needs glasses. For some odd reason I feel like they will adhere to her face and never come off. I feel like she's being set up to be teased her whole life. I feel like I can see the states and hear the rude comments already. I'm not sure why this is so hard for me. Both my husband and I have glasses. It would only be right if one of our children also had glasses. I think it's not so much the glasses I am having a hard time with, it the fact they may not work. We have been teaching and preparing our older children for their sisters new accessory. Our 22 month old loves to say "baby gasses, baby gasses". It's super cute, but as much as we tell her now she can't touch them I know she will try. She is the one child of ours who pushes every limit to the max. She is the one who keeps trying even after being told no 100 times. I had the chance tonight to sit on my bed, feeding Kinsley, and chatting to my five year old. I asked her what she thought of her sister getting glasses and she said "it's awesome! She's going to be the coolest baby in the world because not many babies have glasses." I then asked what she would say or if someone stared at her or said something mean about her having glasses and her response was priceless. "Mom, if they stare or say mean things I will tell sissy not to listen. That I love her very much and she is perfect." She then looked at me and said, "Mommy, god made her special and I wouldnt trade her for a million dollars." I laughed. I am sure glad she wouldn't trade her sister for a million dollars. A heart of gold my five year of has. A heart of gold. I'm up late tonight, praying. Praying that the glasses help. Praying I can come to peace with this journey we've been led to. Praying that I can be strong and show the love of the Lord to any one that wants to stare at my sweet girl just because she has glasses. I'm praying the Lord do his will. I thank the Lord for giving us Kinsley. I thank him for giving us all of our children. I pray he gives my husband and I the tools we need to raise our baby girl despite her vision troubles. Please join me in prayer. Please if you think about us in the morning life us up in prayer. On a non glasses related note; my van will be fixed tomorrow! It is a pain not having it. Dany

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