Laughter, warm hearts, and the dreaded nerves

With a title such as this I feel like I should be writing a comic book. Something along the lines if the dreaded nerves were on the rise today. Hoping to take momma bear down, but laughter and her side kick warm heart moved in to save the day! So as you can see I am not a comic book writer. I will, however, tell you about all three things. My mornings here have been surprisingly peaceful. I have had the time to enjoy my kids getting ready in the morning. This morning was a blessing. As my oldest was getting ready for school she said "Mommy, Mrs Sherrie loves me just like she loves the boy and girl at her house that are her kids. And mommy, the warms my heart.". Oh child, you just warmed mommy's heart to. How sweet of her to say that. For those of you who don't k ow Mrs. Sherrie she is one of the sweetest, most generous teachers ever. She is a special education teacher who truly loves her job and her students. This is our daughters third year with this teacher. mrs. Sherrie is amazing. So ther it is warm heart. Now on to laughter. My brother and his wife will ask why I didn't tell my nephew not to do the following and to that I will only responde because I'm his aunt. Picture this: My daughters bed is pretty tall with an even taller headboard. The headboard has shelves upon which you can set things or stand on. Now picture these super cute four year olds standing way up in the headboard. The twinkle in their eye, the smile on their faces, the belly laughs as they know what they are doing is probably not okay. The. Came the jump. They both jumped onto the mattress of the bed and laughed hysterically. I could not tell them now. I laughed so hard. It was so cute to see them jumping off this high place. Their goal was to knock down the clothes I was trying to fold and put away. They accomplished their goal with might roars of laughter. It was just what I needed. My son and nephew provided me with the best possible therapy today. They allowed me to laugh at something silly. They allowed me to enjoy being a kid. I also got to enjoy candy land and play dough! My nephew loves his cousin Kinsley. And that might be an under statement. He adrores her. If he is around everyone else can forget holding her. In that sweet voice of his and a smile on his face he said "Aunt Dany, I love Kinsley's glasses I want to keep her." once again my heart melted. Laughter and a warm heart did a great job at keeping away the nerves for most if the day. Why am I nervous? Well I am nervous because Early On is coming to the house tomorrow. They will be eveulating Kinsley in speech, physical development, and development. It's only nerve wrecking because it makes it seem more real that she has needs that I can not meet for her in my own. I don't want to be told I am parenting her the wrong way or that I should be doing more. Early On coming out also brings feelings of joy. I will get advice, resources, and help. I have never raised a baby with limited to no sight and need all the advice from professionals that I can get. If you get a chance say an extra prayer for us tomorrow. That I won't be nervous. That I take everything that is presented before me tomorrow in a positive way. Pray for Kelly as he will be at work and not able to attend. Help us to make the right choices based on the advice of the professionals coming to work with us. Danyelle

Attitude and Lots of it

Attitude. Good, bad or otherwise attitude is everything. Everything today has reminded me about attitude. Today has made attitude the center of my prayers and my day. Lord do I have the right attitude? What kind of attitude should I have? Am I passing down an attitude to my children that I would like them to have? It's all about attitude. We have four girls in this house. That's a lot of attitude! Our oldest can have a big one at times. What five and and a half year old doesn't. Lately though I have noticed a change her attitude is right in line with mine. If I'm being grumpy and short tempered so is she, if I am giving my kids an attitude she is dishing one right back at me. Where I see her not so sweet attitude the most is in the morning. She hates getting up early for school. She hates having to get ready by a certain time. This is always where things get bad. This is where we butt heads, especially of I have woken up late or grumpy. I have changed my morning attitude. I have made getting ready a fun game. We race. We race to see if she can get dressed faster then I can get one of her sisters dressed. We see who can eat the fastest. We see if she can beat the timer to get shoes on. This has made our mornings fun! I changed my attitude and she changed her's. W have had five school mornings in a row with no bad attitudes! Praise the Lord. Then we have the attitude f our almost two year old! She has a BIG attitude! She is two going on twenty. She wants to do everything by her self. She says "no talk to me". And she can throw one heck of a fit. She is all attitude. She isn't fighter. She is a go getter. I think her type of attitude is nescessary at some points. I also think its important that we, as parentsm try to curb this negative attitude and develope one that is a wee kinder. The lesson I learned today is two fold. I need to change my attitude about this journey we are on. I need to allow myself to see hope in the glasses. I need to be like my five year old who changes her attitude if mommy does. I need to adopt the attitudes of those around me that have hope for Kinsleys glasses. I need to let myself hope. I know there will be people to pick me up if my hopes are crushed. I need to hope for now so I can wake up each morning and be okay. The other lessoned I learn was I need to be like. My almost two year old. I need to be a fighter, strong willed, independent. I need to be these things for Kinsley. I need to fight for her care, her progress, her well being no matter what the outcome of her vision is. Sometimes I need to say a nice adult version of "no talk to me". It's okay to have both kinds of attitudes at some point through this whole journey. My prayer today is that the Lord will bless me with a posititve attitude when looking at the out come if these glasses. I am asking he provide me with a hope and believe that through him all things are possible. Please join me in prayer. I know that if I have the right attitude so will the rest of my family. I am on my knees Lord. Give us hope, given us positive attitude, and give us your grace! Danyelle

Comments From the Peanut Gallery

So I have every intention of making a post about our first full day in glasses, but the day just got away from me. Saturday morning was fabulous. Kelly was up before me getting ready for robotics. I was still laying in bed when I heard laughter coming down the hall. Sure enough, my wake up call was coming. Looking at the clock I was wishing my little wake up calls would go back to bed. It was Saturday after all and 7:30am just seemed to early for a Saturday. They seemed to disagree. The girls were full of energy. They were chasing each other in circles and laughing loudly. What an awesome way to start the morning. Before I got Kinsley up for the day I fed the bigger kids. Then it was Kinsleys turn. There was an extra step to our morning routine. As I laid her on the changing table to get her ready so etching had to change. We had to add the step I didn't want to. The time had come. I got out her clothes and diaper. I got her dressed, talking to her about every thing I was doing. Then it happened. I took her glasses out of the case. I slowly, carefully, gently put them on her face. Once again hoping to se instan change, I was disappointed. Kelly left for the day, but in his place my mom came. She came to watch the kids so I could work. I sew for a living. A way to make an extra income yet stay at homs with my children. My nine store opens the middle of February and I need to have stuff ready to stock. I sewed into the early afternoon. When I finished I talked to my mom about gong to get Kinsley's eats pierced with me. She thought it was a great idea! So when Kelly got how we left. This was going to be my first time taking Kinsley out with her glasses on. I was nervous. I feared the comments and stares. My momma bear instinct wanted to tear apart anyone who said something. As I was driving, noticing he emotions, I prayed "Lord, I know what I feel like saying to someone if the comment or stare, but please speak for me so my words are kinder." The time came. I pulled into the parking lt at the mall. I needed to walk my sweet girl in to ge her ears pierced. They weren't going to come out to me. So I did. I ventured into the mall. No me noticed her glasses until we reached the counter of the ear pierce place. The first comment made was by the woman who would pierce Kisleys ears. "Aww, she has glasses." I didn't know how to responde. Was this a question or a statement! What kind of response did it require. The Bly thing I could muster was a yes. That out of the way my mom and I started looking at earrings. We decided on go,d heart shaped earrings with a pink center. They are cute! Funny thing about this experience was that I got stares from people who couldn't believe I wa piercing my baby's ears and they didn't bug me. It something I wanted her to have done. All my girls had them done at this age. It didn't bug me they stared in disapproval. It did, however, bug me when they stared at her glasses. My thinking behind this is that the earrings are something I could control. I could do it at this age or wait. The glasses I can't control. The possibility of her not being able to see is out of my hands. I can not protect her from years of teasing or hurt because of glasses. I can take out the earrings if I chose. That fact that her vision is out of my hands kills me. I would do anything to trade vision with her. I can not. This road of poor vision we the be God chose for her. My day of having a hard time dealing with stares and comments would continue. I survived the mall. I needed to now go to Walmart, I needed to pick up a few things. This aw hard. Every stare was deeper, every comment loud. Questions on why she had glasses and how we knew she needed them were being asked. The aww poor baby has glasses comments were painful. I answered questions the best I could. It was the Lord speaking for me though because all I wanted to shout was leave my baby alone! Stop asking questions! Every time some asks a question or makes a comment I tell myself they may not work. It stinks to be reminded of that. I need to grow tougher skin. I need to let go. I need to know its nr meant to hurt me on purpose, but it does. The rest of he day was pretty uneventful. We relaxed at home and enjoyed family time. Our first full day in glasses was survived. The next morning we would see how church went. Today we woke up to snow. Not just a little snow either. I would say a good three or more inches. Today aw a church day as my kids say. Kelly was on sick kd duty, so it wa only me, Kinsley, Myla, and Parker going to church. Ondrea was feeling better, but I wanted he to rest one more day so she could go to school tomorrow. As I got everyone ready I aw confident about walking nt church. A church I am surrounded by love and support. Surrounded by prayer. It is a safe place. No need to worry about comments or stares. When we first walked in the group that meets before service was getting ready to pray. We joined in. We were able to pray for Kinsley's eyes. I wish I would have known I needed prayer to. Disappointed already that we didn't see instant working power from the glasses on Friday every one seemed to comment on how they thought they were working. This was hard! Being her mother and being around her all the time, I haven't noticed much, if any, change in her vision. I needed a breather. I was hungry and thirsty. I went to the gas station to get a pop and donut. On my way I placed my debit card and phone on my lap. Pulling out of the driveway of the church parking lot I decided I couldnt see out ofe of my windows to well. Forgetting that my phone and card were on my lap I got out of the van. Sure enough the card and phone would not be phone. They were lost in the almost six inches of snow we had received. Many people came out to help me look with no luck. After getting some cash, I was still able to get my donut and pop. Returning to church left more people commenting about how they thought her glasses were working. I know these comments were meant to be encouraging and not hurtful. I know they were said out of love and concern. I know, but they still hurt. I feel like the comments plant a false hope in my heart. I feel like if ingest my hopes up to high they will be crushed in four weeks when the doctor says she can not see. I was speechless. I really didn't know what to tell all these people about their comments. Do I thank them? Do I tell them how I feel? I chose to smile and nod. After church we went to have lunch at the house of a couple that goes to our church. It was an amazing lunch. Simple and delicious. My children loved it there. This couple is amazing to. They are so sweet. Such listening ears they have. It was nice to be ourselves. They didn't require we explain about her eyes, they just showed is love and kindness. I felt like I was safe to think about other things other then Kinsley's sight or lack there of. It was an afternoon breather that was much needed. I thanked the Lord for such an amazing afternoon. Once home, it was another u eventual afternoon and evening. I took a late and somewhat long nap. I got the older kinds in bed, rocked Kinsley, and watched a movie with my husband. We made it through two full days of glasses. We are all adjusting. Kinsley doesn't seem to mind them. Mommy is getting used to the idea and Myla just keeps saying "baby glasses, baby glasses" it is quite cute. I pray the Lord do his will with Kinsley's sight. I know that I am praying the Lord heal her fully so that she doesn't even need the glasses. I pray that even of she does need the glasses her vision will be winderful. I know full well that this may not be God's plan for our baby. He may chose her to have no sight at all. If this is his will I pray that he gives Kelly and I peace and understanding. I pray he gives us the support we need to make it through this journey. Will you please continue to pray for Kinsley. Pray the Lords will be done, but also pray for him to do a winderful m miricale in Kinsleys eyes and restore them to full strength. I can feel your prayers for our family. It means a lot to us to have your prayers and support. Thank you for joining us on this journey. Danyelle

The big day

Friday's are normally my day to sleep in, but today was the big day! Kinsley was scheduled to get her glasses at 9:30am. My van was still in the shop being fixed so I had a wonderful lady from our church pick the kids and I up. Have I mentioned how wonderful the support we have is? Just before this lady came to get me I got a call from the eye doctor. Kinsley's glasses were not in yet. They were due to arrive today, but they wouldn't have them ready before our scheduled time. As much as I didn't want this day to happened I was disappointed. I wanted to get the initial shock and pain of seeing my baby girl in glasses over. I wanted to be able to move on with our new accessory. I never in a million years thought glasses would bring on so many emotions. Once we we got to town I dropped the kids off with my mom and went out with this lady to McDonalds. It was a time for fellowship. A time to be able to talk to another adult. Boy do I forget I need these times. Being a stay at home mom I sometimes get so wrapped up in my kids I forget that I need some mommy time. It was so amazing how much better a felt after an hour if talking. The focus wasn't on Kinsley either. I was asked about my other children and this was huge! Dealing with Kinsleys vision issues I have been caught up. I have been so focused on doing research and looking for the best ways to help her I sometimes forget that there are 3 other kids that need their time to shine. From the bottom of my heart I am so grateful for the time to talk. It helped take my mind off the event of the day. On my way home from this get together the eye doctor called. Kinsley's glasses did come in the shipment they received this morning and wanted me to bring her in at 1:45pm. This was really happening. She was going to get her glasses. I spent some time at my brothers loving on my nephews and talking to my mom. Then it was time to get ready to leave. I got nervous. My knees were shaking, my stomach churning. Why was I feeling this way! I was getting fusterared with myself. They are just glasses for goodness sake! Thats the thing though. To me they aren't just glasses. They are my daughters future. They are the tool that tells us if she can see of if she can't. They are a blessing or a curse. To me they are my hope. They are the answer to my prayer if they work. The are also the pathway to even more questions and sorrow. Once at the eye doctor I cried. It was all becoming so real so fast. They called Kinsley's name. Here goes nothing I thought to myself. Here I stood in front of the counter. Kinsley still in her carseat the nice lady took her glasses out of the case. There they were. Time to face my fears. Those tiny purple glasses were almost to my hands. I didn't want to touch them, but knew I had to. The lady made sure the lenses were clean and then handed them to me, "here" she said, "put them on here so that we know they fit." They were in my hands! Ah, get them out I wanted to scream. This isn't real. My baby doesn't really need them! Sure enough, they were there. I slowly put them on her tiny head. She didn't like them. They were fitting funny because she was still in her carseat. I took her out of the carseat and got them on her face the way they were supposed to. She looked so cute. The purple was the perfect color for her complexion. Her daddy (and yes I said daddy) did a wonderful job picking out the color. I cried a little more Everyone was waiting to see her. My mom, Kinsley's favorite cousin, and her siblings were all waiting at my brothers to see her. People wanted me to send them pictures. It was great to have support. I needed the support. To know I have people surrounding our family in love to get us through these times. Tonight has been rough time. Although I knew I was only kidding myself I was hoping to see instant improvement. I wants the results of the glasses to happen the second I out them in her face. I think as humans we want everything done as soon as possible. I cried. I really wanted to see results tonight. I really wanted to see that the glasses were the tool she needed to see me today. Now I am praying they just work. I am praying that the Lord will make the glasses help her vision in his time. I am reminding myself that God does all things in his time. He is teaching me lessons through this journey. I will continue to cling to my faith in him. Tonight I am going to bed in peace. Peace in the fact that God is carrying my family through the uncertainty that the glasses will work. Uncertainty on wether or not she can see. Please continue to pray for our family. Pray for peace. Pray also for understanding. Understanding for why this is all happening to us. Pray Kinsley adjusts to the glasses. Please also pray that if we get any stares or rude comments that will handle them in a Christ like manner. Dany

The last day

Today is the day I've been hoping wouldn't come. Today is the last day my sweet baby girl will not have something covering her eyes at all waking times. Her glasses will be placed on her sweet face for the first time tomorrow. The appointment is first thing in the morning which is nice. I really just want to get it done and over with. For some reason in my head I keep picturing her with glasses and can't. It seems so unnatural that a three month old would need them. It seems so unreal that MY three month old needs glasses. For some odd reason I feel like they will adhere to her face and never come off. I feel like she's being set up to be teased her whole life. I feel like I can see the states and hear the rude comments already. I'm not sure why this is so hard for me. Both my husband and I have glasses. It would only be right if one of our children also had glasses. I think it's not so much the glasses I am having a hard time with, it the fact they may not work. We have been teaching and preparing our older children for their sisters new accessory. Our 22 month old loves to say "baby gasses, baby gasses". It's super cute, but as much as we tell her now she can't touch them I know she will try. She is the one child of ours who pushes every limit to the max. She is the one who keeps trying even after being told no 100 times. I had the chance tonight to sit on my bed, feeding Kinsley, and chatting to my five year old. I asked her what she thought of her sister getting glasses and she said "it's awesome! She's going to be the coolest baby in the world because not many babies have glasses." I then asked what she would say or if someone stared at her or said something mean about her having glasses and her response was priceless. "Mom, if they stare or say mean things I will tell sissy not to listen. That I love her very much and she is perfect." She then looked at me and said, "Mommy, god made her special and I wouldnt trade her for a million dollars." I laughed. I am sure glad she wouldn't trade her sister for a million dollars. A heart of gold my five year of has. A heart of gold. I'm up late tonight, praying. Praying that the glasses help. Praying I can come to peace with this journey we've been led to. Praying that I can be strong and show the love of the Lord to any one that wants to stare at my sweet girl just because she has glasses. I'm praying the Lord do his will. I thank the Lord for giving us Kinsley. I thank him for giving us all of our children. I pray he gives my husband and I the tools we need to raise our baby girl despite her vision troubles. Please join me in prayer. Please if you think about us in the morning life us up in prayer. On a non glasses related note; my van will be fixed tomorrow! It is a pain not having it. Dany

Randomness

Today was a very random day. It was unpredictable. In light of trying to keep my mind off of my sweet baby getting her glasses in a few days I took the kids to play at our local church "jungle". It's an indoor playground that is open during the day for the kids. I went with my mom, my kids and my nephews. It was fun to watch them run and play. The boys played a racing game where they would see who was fastest. My youngest nephew and daughter went down the slide more times then I can count. They loved it when I would count to 3 and then say go. What a way to keep my mind on the present. My mom took Kinsley up to the office of the church to show her off to some of the staff/friends there. One of the pastors laid hands on Kinsley's eyes and asked the Lord to heal them. Give her new one. That is my same prayer. Please Lord give her new eyes. Today as been rough in the sense I'm still sad and nervous about what people will say. On the way back to my bothers by van was acting up. Not a stress I wanted to deal with today! It was saying all sorts of things to me. Low levels and to hot. I knew it wasn't good. I let my van rest for a while. On the way home it did the same thing. It was over heating. Lord. Do you know see how much I have on my plate? Do I need a broken van to? At my father in laws house my husband and his dad tried fixing the van. No such luck. Tis left me I a panic. Not knowing when my van will be fixed I was having issue. Kinsley needed to get her glasses Friday. She NEEDS those glasses. It is my hope they help her see. After making a few phone calls I was able to find a ride for Friday and all worked out. I knew it would. I serve a mighty God! Yes I am having a hard time with this journey. It is tough for any parent. We mourn the loss of certain things we wish our children could do. Today I cried because she may never see her own smile, her own wedding dress, her own children if she chooses to have them. I am having a hard time and asking questions of my savior. But I know my savior is in control. I know he is carrying me through this. If I don't ask him questions how will I be able to listen for the answers I need. How can he show me his marvelous plan if I dont ask questions. He is a mighty God. He has plans for Kinsley and our family. Some amazing things are happening in our family despite the vision issues. I hope we can share more with you soon about how God's plan is panning out, but for now it remains a secret. Please continue to pray. Dany

Sight or No Sight? That is the question.

As I sit and stare into the eyes of my baby I can't help but wonder. Does she see me? Will she ever see me? Will she ever be able to see the waves crashing on the beach in the heat of the summer? Will she ever be able to see the snow dancing down from their place in the sky? She doesn't track movement. I try hard every day to get her to track. Every day I stare deep into her eyes hoping she will make eye contact back. Why does this have to be so hard? As we move farther away from the day of her appointment and closer to glasses day things have been up and down. The Lord has blessed me with a baby girl. Perfect in his eyes. Entrusted to Kelly and I to raise. I still question his reasoning. I still mourn the possibility of lost vision. Does this make me a bad Christian? Of course not. It makes me human! I trust he will lead us down the right path. I know he will give us the support we need. My God is a God of miricales and love! Today I am mourning the fact she may not see me ever, but I'm also rejoicing. She is cooing! She laughs. And boy, oh boy, does she smile when she hears her mommy and daddy! Those a moments to rejoice over. We are moving closer to glasses day! 3 more sleeps my older kids would say. (if mommy could get sleep). Friday is the big day. Please pray that the glasses help. Pray that we won't get negative comments or stares about her glasses. Pray that if we do get the negative stuff we respond in a Christ like way. Thank you for your support and encouragement along this journey. Dany

A Day of Uncertianity

January 17th is a day I won't forget! I knew I would be taking Kinsley to the eye doctor. I assumed I would be going alone since Kelly had to work. my morning was pretty filled and I was able to keep my mind off the afternoons event. I spent the morning as the parent helper in Ondrea's class. It was summer day! We got to dress in summer clothes despite the fact the the pasture outside was chilling! We got to enjoy ice cream and ice cream cones for snack. W did lots of summer activities. It was just what I needed to keep my mind from worrying about the appointment I was going to be bringing Kinsley to later in the day. After playing at school with Ondrea I told her goodbye as she stayed to do special Ed. I went to my brothers where I got to spend time with my mom, kids, and nephews before I had to take Kinsley to the doctor. My middle nephew loves his cousin. He adores her. If he is around good luck holding her! He walked why she needed to go to the doctor. He was concerned about his baby cousin. I also was able to talk to my mom in regards to my concerns about Kinsley and ask her for prayer. Then I left I suddenly got nervous, anxious, and scared. What would this doctor tell me about my perfect little girl. Would she confirm that I am crazy? Would she tell me my fears were real? Would her vision be an easy fix? With Kelly by my side we watched and listened to the doctor run her test. She threw out numbers and other big words. Her left eye had a pink and gray optic nerve, her retina looked good. Her right eye had a pink optic nerve and great retina. The doctor wasn't impressed with what she was seeing. We heard a lot of "this is not good, she should be/shouldnt be doing this or that. It was hard. Like a bad nightmare I couldnt wake up from. I longed so badly to be crazy. I wanted to hear " her vision is perfect, I don't know what you were seeing that was wrong." more questions flooded my head. Why? How? Then there was hope. The doctor started trying to figure out what prescription Kinsley's glasses needed to be. "oh yay!" I thought to myself, "she must be able to see if we are being fitted for glasses." Then Kelly asked what I was thinking. "So, because your fitting her for glasses that means she can see right?" he asked. Then my hope crashed on the floor like a broken mirror. The words that came from the doctors mouth were like being Haitian the face. She said, "I'm not saying she can or can't. I still have my doubts she can see." There it was. My fear brought out in the open. I wanted to break down. I felt my prayers for good vision were being unheard We were told where to go get Kinsley's glasses. We were told to try the glasses for 4 weeks. We would then go back and see if they helped her vision at all. If not we will be doing an MRI to see what is wrong in her brain making it so she can't see. If they work that's awesome. We will then just continue to moniter her vision. We packed up Kinsley in her carseat and drove down the road to where we could get her glasses. We looked at the different colors and sizes. We tried a couple on to see what ones fit. Then it was time to pick a color. Daddy wanted purple! So our sweet baby Kinsley will be wearing Purple glasses. They had to order her frames and lenses. This means we pick up her glasses January 27th. Her follow up appointment with the eye doctor will be february 28th at 3:30. Please please continue to pray. Our whole family needs prayer. Dany

Am I Going Crazy?

Am I going crazy is a question I asked myself a lot in the last three weeks or so. It was the question I asked as I started to notice my sweet ba y girl wasn't doing what she should for her age. It was the question I asked ever time I noticed that she didn't track an item with her eyes or responde to my warm smile. I must be going crazy. There is no way she couldn't see. She is a perfectly healthy baby. My fears were starting to become a reality. More and more people were questioning why she wouldn't look at them. More and more people were noticing that she didn't track objects. When I brought my concerns up to my husband he said he had the same ones. When I brought my concerns up to my mom she said she thought something was up also. Wow, I really must not be crazy I though to myself. My wish to be crazy become an even greater wish. I wished none of us were seeing what we were. My baby is perfectly healthy. Nothing can be wrong with her vision. We are all just imagining the same things! It had to be. I couldn't face reality. Then the pediatrician noticed. She noticed that Kinsley wasn't tracking the light the doctor was singing in her face. Now what? Now what was only one of the questions I was asking. Why me? Why my family? Don't I have enough on my plate Lord? Why does my family have to do this journey? How will we do this journey. I have been praying these questions for days. The doctor gave us 2 options: 1. We can start calling around to eye doctors and see if someone would see my sweet baby girl or 2. We could wait till her 4 month checkup in February and see if her vision has gotten better. My mommy gut was telling me that it couldn't wait another month. I had to start calling eye doctors as soon as I could. I needed answers. Monday january 26th I started calling eye doctor after eye doctor. I needed to find someone that would take our insurance and a 3 month old baby (just a side note to the way the Lord works - this is the first year ever we have had vision insurance and he knew we would need it). I ended up finding a place that could get her in on February 6th. I scheduled it i hope that someone could get me in sooner, but not willing to kose the spot. So I called some more. I fund someone that could get me in on the 25th of January. Sweet that was better yet! I will take it I said. At 4:30 that afternoon the place that couldn't get Kinsley in until February called back and said they has an opening for the next day! Do I want it they asked? Of course! God knew my baby couldn't wait. He knew this mommy needed answers. We took it. It was about to be a sleepless night. Our family is going on an incredible journey. I wanted to write a blog to be hopeful, inspire, ans share with other what we are going through. It is also a place for me to be real with my thoughts and feelings as we take this path. The Lord will guide this path we are on. I ask that you join us. Offer words of encouragement, support, and love, they will be needed. Prayers are welcome! We need prayers also. If you choose to take this journey with us, please remember 2 thinks. 1. Some posts with be happy and upbeat. 2. Some posts will be heavy with emotions and the real mess of what we face. Thenk you for doing this journey with us, Dany Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord, "Plans for good and. Ot disaster. Plans to give you a future and hope."