Haiti and Babies

Two things have been heavily on my mind today. Haiti and babies. Now I am not sure that the two are connected or not. I mean I am sure there are plenty of babies in Haiti, but that is not how I am seeing the two.

You see Haiti has been on the hearts of my family since the earthquake. Then we had a couple who are missionaries in Haiti come to our church. That is when our daughter fell in love. My husband and I were even more captivated by this country then we were when we walked into church that day. We had talked and prayed for Haiti often. We had discussed taking a trip to Haiti. We told ourselves if the opportunity arose we would jump on it. One of us would go. Well then it happened. There was a church mission trip that was happening from our mother church (we go to a church plant). They wanted to know if anyone from our church wanted to go. We both did, but it just isn't that easy. First of all the money was a factor. Then we had three kids that we would need to find child care for. Could they be away from their mom AND dad that long? We prayed about it. Then we made a deal with God. If He gave Kelly a big enough bonus to cover the trips for both of us to go we would go. Little did we know that he would give us double what we needed to cover our trip. It was amazing. Childcare was easy to line up and soon we were off on an adventure like we have never been on before. While we were their we rejoiced with the people who have found aid and happiness after the quake. We also shed tears for those still in turmoil and for the poverty we saw there. It was such a culture shock. It was hot, but the Lord blessed us every day. The kids at the school we were helping rebuild were beyond cute! They were amazing. I think about Haiti often. How I wish to go back. How I wish maybe some day we can adopt from there. I often think of ways I can bless someone in Haiti. Haiti has been coming up again in a lot of ways. Radio, Facebook, and thoughts. I am not sure what God is trying to tell me with the constant reminders, but I am more then willing to wait for him to reveal the whole plan.

Babies. You see I wanted a LARGE family. I wanted lots of children. My body on the other hand choose to not work. It works for growing these sweet bundles of joy, but the after part is what almost killed me. Butterfly girl is the same age now as Monkey girl was back then when we found out we were expecting her. I long to hold a small squishy baby. We made the right choices by not having any more of our own. One day we will hold another squishy we can call ours even though it may not be blood related. We would love to give a sweet baby some snuggles and even a home if it needs one. Maybe one day a little love bug will come home from Haiti.

Birthdays!

So I thought this posted yesterday, but I guess not.

6 years ago today I thought I was going to be having a birthday dinner with my family. Little did I know that my oldest bundle of joy was going to arrive.

I had been having some complications in my pregnancy. The Monday before I went in for a non stress test to see how my baby girl was doing. Although she was passing the non stress test it took a lot of effort to get her to pass. The doctor was concerned. He asked me what I was doing on Wednesday and I said I was going out for dinner with my family to celebrate my birthday. He preceded to tell me I was wrong and that I was going to have a baby. My baby was going to be exactly four weeks earlier then planned. It was okay though, the doctor said babies who come four weeks early usually come out fine. I was do for a c section as little miss thought she would be breech.

So six years ago today I went into the hospital. I waited with many friends and family to have our baby girl. I was told that once I had her, her dad and the doctor would go up to the nursery with her and get her cleaned off and wrapped in a blanket. Then she would go to my room and that is where she, her dad, and the rest of my family would be waiting for me. I was hoping later that day we could celebrate with cake and ice cream. We were going to have tons to celebrate.

I went in for the csection. It was quick and easy. I got to hear a strong healthy cry form my little girl. She was little too. Five pounds and eleven ounces. Everyone waits to hear that first scream to know there baby is fine. I heard it and my heart felt better. She was happy and healthy. We got some pictures taken and then they headed her up three floors to the nursery. They finished sewing me up. I then headed into my worst nightmare. As we went past the nursery window all I saw was a doctor and a bunch of nurses surrounding a little tiny baby. My family was peering in the window. That was funny I thought, why would they be looking at this sick baby when they could hold and google over mine. Not one of them looked me in the eye as we past. When I got to my room it was empty. NO ONE was to be found. Not my baby, nor my family. I started to get worried. My mom came in and told me they would bring me the baby in a minute. More people just came in and smiled. Every moment that passed I got more and more worried.

Finally the doctor. Wait, the doctor, but no baby. This was not going to be good news. My sweet bundle of joy that had given that loud healthy cry right after birth was in distress. She was under an oxygen hood, but it was not doing much. They needed to start some intravenouses supply lines in her belly button. They then need to put her on a CPAP. I couldn't get out of bed right away because my legs were still numb from the pain meds. Finally they did lift me into a wheel chair, wheeled me down, and allowed me to look and touch her. I was sad though because I was not able to hold her. She needed to stay under the oxygen hood until someone gets to us with more experience. They then transported her tiny little body over to Helen DeVos Children's Hospital.

That was that. No birthday cake. No holding my baby. Nothing. I was so sad. I am thankful today however that I can say she is thriving and doing well. I can not believe that she is six today! She is a strong girl. She loves the Lord with all her heart. She believes every dream is achievable as long as you put in the right work.

Bunny Girl.... Mommy loves you to the moon and back. I hope you had the very best birthday!